I LOVE (love love love) to sleep.

I have a student in my room. He's chatting with me about how he needs to get his math done. Then he says he would rather be doing math homework than be in the pool right now. Turns out they have a 3 hour swim practice today. Thanks for boosting my ego.

He's probably 15. Sophomore. Still relatively small. He says he got nine hours of sleep last night but he's still SOOOO exhausted. I say that's probably because you're a teenager. You're probably growing. He does some more math. He's quiet for a bit, and he tricks me into thinking I might get some work done.

He asks how much sleep I get each night. I say between 5 and 8 hours, 8 if I'm lucky (lucky meaning I go to bed when all the 85 year old people go to bed, not twenty-something newlyweds). He's quiet again.

He's looking at me confused. He asks how long I'm going to do this. Do what?

"How long are you going to get only 5 hours of sleep? The rest of your life?"
I have never thought about that.

How long am I going to do this? How long can I do this? And please, I'm not just talking about getting 5 hours of sleep. That's probably at the top of my list of gripes, but it isn't the most stressing. How long can I realistically give as much of myself as I am currently giving?

I have 217 students. I pick them up, drop them off, call home, text parents, text kids, email, grade, plan, prep, console, counsel, discipline, reinforce, tease (lovingly), support, develop and nurture. I also cry, lose sleep, yell (in my car when I'm all alone) and put my head on my desk.

I often think of what else I could do as a career. I often fantasize about having a "regular" job. A job where I punch in, punch out, maybe wear a uniform (so I don't need to worry about teenagers oogling my cleavage or dropping pencils on purpose so I pick them up), where the roughest part of my day is deciding where to go for lunch, on my HOUR long lunch break. A job where I could have conversations with adults about adult things like orthopedic shoes, gas mileage, and Sears. A job where I would feel adequately paid for my work, where I might even say "I have the better end of this deal!". A job where a teenager wouldn't rub it in my face that I am going to be sleep deprived for the REST OF MY LIFE.

But if I had that job, I would probably dream about being a teacher. That means I would miss hearing the same kid, the one that reminded me I go to bed when his grandparents do, say "I should have just done my homework the first time". I think I can go home now.